Who Really Belongs at Yoga?

Musings From the Mat Part 1

Image/ Olena Yakobchuk/ Shutterstock

by Kyla Dagenais, Co-author of The 90 Day Meditation Challenge

The most meaningful compliment I ever received in class was from a student who looked at me and said, “Your yoga class is full of people who look like they don’t belong at yoga.” This sentiment has stayed with me for years.

The truth is that I have never felt like I ‘belong’ at yoga, and belonging has never been what has brought me to my mat. I don't know if I have ever felt like I belong anywhere, to be completely honest. It was sadness and despair that brought me to the mat in the first place - feeling like a stranger within myself - the feeling of loneliness and unworthiness that got me to my first yoga class.

I remember the first time I sat on my mat as if it were yesterday. I was 40 pounds (c.18kgs) overweight, at the beginning of a divorce, and in the darkest space. I didn’t attend out of boredom or the want to join a tribe. I joined because I had read the words of the Dalai Lama, and he spoke of the yogi who sought peace within themselves and how the yogi was able to achieve a resilient mind in the suffering of life.

It had absolutely nothing to do with looking good.

I sat on my mat to find peace within myself, hoping to let go of my beliefs about my worth on this planet.

I have never really felt like I belonged anywhere, which led me through a life of continuously changing shape for those around me to feel the validation I longed for in myself. Accepting my quirks and flaws as others had seen them, a part of me wanted to think that I had a purpose and reason to be here, as strange as I am.

At the time, I’m sure I was like everyone else. I was trying to get away from myself, and I believe that’s what yoga offered me. But not in the sense I assumed it would.

I thought I would ‘fix’ myself.

Instead, I started to understand myself, and it was here that yoga planted the seeds of acceptance.

In some circles, yoga has been reduced to a shell of its glory. It could unlock understanding and purpose. Or it could be the yoga show we see today - just another challenge to complete.

At its roots, yoga has the potential to offer a presence in all moments of our lives, a richness far beyond the offerings of money, looks, and glory.

We can find our true selves in the poses. Beautiful as we are.

Yoga is for everyone and does not judge the person practicing. It’s the mindset we can cultivate while we move within our bodies. Our mats can become a space for genuine expression, where our minds may find rest and hearts can be heard without judgment.

Where or when have you felt the most expressive, at peace or content, free from all judgment?

With love,

Kyla.