How to Enjoy Holiday Food Without Spiking Your Blood Sugar Like a Volleyball

Becaause you need to live, not just survive

Hey friends,

The holidays are a metabolic obstacle course.

Everywhere you look, there’s sugar and carbs disguised as fun. Cookies. Pie. Mashed potatoes used as a butter or gravy delivery mechanism. With all of the stress, late nights, travel, and alcohol, your blood sugar is riding a rollercoaster.

But.

You don’t need to “be good,” skip dessert, or punish yourself with January guilt to avoid wrecking your blood sugar.

You just need to stop spiking it like an amateur and learn some finesse.

Disclaimer: This is not medical advice. Please consult with a medical professional before doing ANYTHING, even breathing. By reading any more of these words, you accept all responsibility for whatever crazy shenanigans you or your body will be getting up to, including whatever mistletoe and alcohol-infused feeding frenzies you partake in.

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Why High Blood Sugar Is a Problem

When your blood sugar spikes, a few things happen fast, and none of them are that good for you.

First comes the surge. Energy. Warmth. Confidence. “I feel great! Barkeep, I’ll have another!”

Then, you crash. Sleepy with a side of foggy and irritable. Cravings show up out of nowhere. Suddenly, you’re hunting butter tarts and cookies like a squirrel looking for his nuts.

Repeated spikes do more than make you crash:

• You get stronger cravings later in the day

• It makes you store fat like a hoarder keeps old bread bags and empty

• It destroys your “willpower” and “won’tpower”

The holidays are super dangerous because we feel like we’ve got no rules. All bets are off. We pile more on the plate, trying every dish. We stack desserts like Jenga blocks.

But you can outsmart the problem without becoming “that guy” who brings protein powder to Grandma’s house. Unless Grandma is into that kind of thing.

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The Holiday Blood Sugar Trap

The problem isn’t holiday food. The problem is how it’s eaten.

Most holiday meals follow this pattern:

• Arrive starving

• Start with bread, booze, or sugary drinks

• Eat carbs first, protein later

• Finish with dessert on top of dessert

• Sit motionless afterward

That order is basically a spike invitation written in gravy.

Refined carbs and sugar hit your bloodstream fast. When they arrive with no buffer, blood sugar spikes high, then drops hard when there is a massive rush of insulin. Start the crash, cravings, and the fattening.

You don’t need to avoid these foods. You need to change the sequence.

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The Cheat Code: Eat in the Right Order

If you do only one thing this holiday season, do this. Eat your food in this order:

1. Protein

2. Fiber

3. Fat

4. Carbs and desserts last

And you only need to get that protein in 3 minutes earlier than the carbs to start seeing results.

3 minutes. Is that too much to ask?

Protein and fiber slow digestion. Fat slows down the stomach too. Together, they act like speed bumps for glucose. The carbs still hit, just not like a wrecking ball.

At a holiday dinner, that looks like:

• Turkey, ham, or roast first

• Vegetables next

• Then potatoes, stuffing, bread

• Dessert at the end, not as a standalone event

You’re not eating less. You’re eating smarter. Blood sugar rises more slowly, peaks lower, and crashes less.

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Don’t Self-Sabotage by Showing Up Starving

Walking into a holiday meal hungry is like going grocery shopping hungry. Bad decisions happen. You walk out of the store with sabotage snacks for the car.

When you’re starving:

• You eat faster

• You eat more carbs first

• You overshoot fullness before your brain catches up

The fix is simple: eat a small protein-based snack before you go.

• Greek yogurt

• A protein shake

• Eggs

• Meat, nuts, or cheese

This doesn’t “ruin your appetite.” You still enjoy the meal, just without your blood sugar slamming the gas pedal through the floor.

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Pair Your Carbs Like an Adult

Carbs (or carbs with booze) alone spike blood sugar fastest. Carbs with protein and fat are better.

This matters most for desserts.

Eating pie on an empty stomach is blood sugar body-slamming. Eating it after a protein-rich meal is damage control. Simple pairing rules:

• Dessert comes after dinner, not instead of it

• Add fat when possible. (This does sound like a win for cheesecake lovers, really not sure, but I’m going to pretend it’s true!)

• Slow down

• Potatoes drowned in butter and served with meat are better than plain potatoes alone

Yes, butter helps here. Our bodies are weird, gotta say.

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Walk It Off - You Don’t Need a Workout

You don’t need to “burn it off.” You need to use glucose.

Movement after meals helps muscles soak up blood sugar without needing as much insulin to be released. Remember, the more insulin in the bloodstream, the fatter you will get. It’s a thing. When insulin levels are high, we store fat. Period.

• 10 to 20 minutes of movement.

• An easy pace is enough. You don’t need to sweat.

• No special outfit, gym, or activity required.

• A casual walk

• Helping clean up

• Playing with kids

• Standing instead of collapsing immediately. Avoid the coma! Move around.

Intensity doesn’t matter. Timing does. Moving soon after eating flattens the blood sugar curve like magic.

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Be Strategic With Sugar and Alcohol

Liquids spike blood sugar faster than solids. Alcohol adds chaos.

A few simple rules:

• Skip sugary drinks when possible

• Eat before you drink

• Alternate alcohol with water

• Choose dry wine or spirits over sweet cocktails

For desserts:

• Pick your favorites, skip the filler

• Don’t stack desserts back-to-back

• Eat slowly enough to notice you’re full

You don’t need every dessert. You need the ones you actually care about. For me, this means butter tarts win every time!

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Sleep and Stress Are the Silent Saboteurs

Poor sleep and high stress both make blood sugar harder to control.

When you’re tired or stressed:

• Insulin sensitivity drops

• Cravings rise

• Blood sugar spikes higher from the same food

You can’t control everything during the holidays, but you can:

• Get a better sleep when possible.

• Take short walks to decompress.

• Avoid talking politics!

Stress plus sugar is a great way to make yourself less healthy.

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The “Next Meal Reset” Means No Guilt is Required

One big meal doesn’t break your metabolism and ruin your life forever. The real damage comes from what you do next.

Skipping meals, extreme fasting, or “punishing” yourself just leads to another spike later. You go on a rollercoaster of regret. Instead, reset calmly:

• Eat protein

• Add vegetables

• Hydrate

• Move. Walk. Do some yoga.

Get back to normal, drop the drama. No self-lectures and abuse required.

Your body loves consistency, not shame.

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You Need to Live

You don’t need to avoid holiday food.
You don’t need superhuman discipline.
There’s no reason to suffer for your stuffing, starve yourself before meals, or walk a thousand miles to “burn off” Christmas dinner.

You need:

• Protein first

• Carbs last

• Movement after meals

• Sleep when you can

• Strategy instead of guilt

Enjoy the holidays. Eat the food. Keep your blood sugar steady.

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